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Hey Guys, 

This is my X- Wingman Kenny and He used to live with me a few years a go for about 2 years and was there when I created The Domino Effect where I got a lot more consistent results with women. I think this is a good post about how to deal with other people when “training” or learning pick up.

Here he is…

I recently had a revelation that I fucking hate sarging with PUAs.  Even if I enjoy the people as their normal selves outside of their PUA life, there is not a single worse night out than rolling deep with a group of PUAs with the intent of gaming women.  And this is coming from a guy who loves going to bars + clubs with my friends and hitting on girls once there.  PUAs basically take a super fun + social activity and make it as miserable and excruciating as possible by polluting it with their PUAdom.

1. Normal conversations do not happen in a group of PUAs.

When I’m hanging out with my normal friends, going out is an alternation of chilling with the bros and then talking to girls when I feel like it.  This is fun, balanced, and pleasant- we have normal conversations about normal things, and then it’s natural and easy to talk to girls when we feel like it and the night isn’t a waste if we don’t because we had a good time bro’ing it up.

This is not the case with PUAs.  I don’t fucking know why, but for some reason there’s an unwritten rule that when you are sarging with PUAs you’re either opening sets or more likely just hanging off to the side and discussing gaming theory.  For some reason you have to share your ideas about what you think is effective gaming, past instances of opening sets, who your favorite dating instructors are, and on and on and on and on.  This is dreadfully boring because if you’re a PUA you probably have no clue how to game effectively, your gaming stories are probably fucking stupid, and your favorite instructors are probably full of shit and never got laid, ergo I’d rather not engage in this conversation with you.  Seriously, I’d prefer to exchange stories about what your favorite Ke$ha song is instead, because that is a far more scintillating conversation

2. “How did it go???”

My new rule is that I am going to fucking balltap anybody who ever asks me how a set went.  Why don’t you take a fucking guess, I approached a girl, engaged her in a conversation, used the same fucking lines and routines that I always used, got her phone number, and fully anticipate a flake in the future.  Fucking awesome, am I right???  If anything unique or special ever happens in a set, you will surely be the first to know as I will share the details with you excitedly.  In the meantime, feel free to assume that whatever happened in my set is neither horribly interesting nor important, and that we can skip the whole “How did it go???” conversation and resume our discussion about which work of Ke$ha is most elite.

3. “Yo man, you should have…”

Here’s a very important nugget of wisdom: if you are a PUA, I almost assuredly don’t fucking want your advice or insight.  If you had something useful or helpful to say, you would probably be charging an assload of money for people to hear it; after all 90%+ of PUA instructors are getting paid for advice that isn’t useful.  In the rare case that you have figured out something awesome, it should be readily apparent in your work and all of the bottom feeder PUAs that you encounter will be thirsting for your wisdom.  Until then, the percentages suggest that you’re just another nerd that knows fuckall about women, dating, and social dynamics and you are not getting laid from game.  I quite honestly could give a motherfuck about what you think I should have done and kindly request that you shut the fuck up and keep your erroneous ideas to your damn self.

4. Overemphasizing the Trivial

It’s as if most PUAs want to micro-analyze every step you take and breath you breathe in field.  Example: I holler at a girl across the street, set doesn’t hook, PUA says “she was probably too far away.”  Well jeez, I hadn’t fucking considered that, thanks for the cutting edge insight.  Maybe I didn’t give a fuck that she was too far away and felt like hollering regardless of how poor the odds were of the set hooking.  I am not always going to try to optimize every fucking aspect of my game, it’s not like this is the SAT where I lose points every time I get a question wrong.  Sometimes I’m just going to do whatever the fuck I feel like doing regardless of whether it’s solid game or not; nobody is keeping stats of my performance and even if they were I surely wouldn’t give a fuck about having good ones.  Just fucking relax and don’t sweat it if I don’t hang on every single word of every single set like you do.

5. Lying about success

If you consistently get laid by attractive women via cold approach, you likely have insane attraction vibes from most of the sets that you hook that are immediately apparent to a neutral observer.  Don’t fucking make shit up to me, it will be obvious that you were lying when you can’t  get more than a polite phone number or even hook a set.

6. Living in a game warped reality

I can’t stand it when PUAs always try to over glorify their non accomplishments.  I sincerely don’t care if you had attraction in your last set or not; if you did that’s great and I hope you converted to some sort of close.  If you walked away empty handed or only with a flaky number, it shouldn’t even matter to you whether you had attraction or not, because that girl is gone forever.  So you can only imagine how little it matters to me.

Another thing is that PUAs seem to love gloating over making out with completely shitfaced girls.  Yes, I know it’s exciting to kiss girls and that kissing sober girls is difficult, so when you actually do make out with a girl it’s hard to nitpick over her drunkenness because your lips just got fucking wet, yo!  But the important thing to realize is that when a girl hits a certain level of inebriation where she is only partially wary of reality, that kissing her becomes a very simple task.  The instruction manual for this goes something like 1) Have a pulse 2) Place your lips in the vicinity of hers 3) Profit.  So hooray for small victories, but if you’re running mediocre or better game, you should be getting the full monty with any woefully drunk girl; that is once you get past the moral questionability and the fact that you may be open to rape charges at more extreme levels of intoxication.  I know that the PUA community opens your eyes to a whole new world, but I suggest that you take a cursory glance back at reality every now and again to assure that you’re not being a complete fucking creep.

Throw-Back 

This is Kenny talking about our journey . This video was taken in 2009, when I was abusing The Domino Effect.

So yeah, with all of this shit having a fun night of bro’ing and hoe’ing becomes a tantalizingly shitty night of belaboring the bottom feeder status of the community to which you belong.  Approaching strangers is inherently low value, and to derive any form of value from cold approach you very badly need to be balanced and successful in other aspects of life.  Yet PUAs insist on accentuating the fact that they belong to one of the most loser driven social communities on the face of the planet, which turns up the pressure to get results and sucks any fun and positive energy out of the experience.  You don’t need to adapt your game and create new routines every moment out in the field, in fact I’d advise against being introspective in field altogether.  Just as you need to balance PUA life with normal activities, it is also recommended to balance your sarging with normal social behavior.  If you have been gaming for years, pretend that you have opened multiple sets in your past and that this shit is not fucking new to you.  There is value to understanding game and being adept at approaching women who are complete strangers, but for fuck’s sake once you get the hang of it it’s OK to do it as you’re a socially normal person one fucking time.

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Firstly, it appears that my blog is getting more popular and I am getting tons of emails asking me to post more regularly. Truth is, I have been focusing on my book and coaching. Also, I was studying for a certification course ‘non-dating’ related. Additionally, I had to manage some new girlfriends that I am presently dealing with. It has been fun.

Justin Wayne Dating

Despite all that, I will try and do a new post every week since I will have more time soon.

I decided to throw you guys a freebie video with solid content regarding seduction from a stranger approaching perspective. I have spent more time talking about how to create a Romantic Connection with women.

This video is dedicated for ALL users. Whether you have a romantic connection or you are just playing the numbers game, this is applicable from a stranger approaching context.

The Justin Wayne Seduction Workshop 2011 video is HERE:

BONUS INFIELD VIDEO:

This weekend was fun. Firstly, I had a client named “Pacino” who enrolled in The Justin Wayne Training Program.

Pacino on First Instant Date

He was able to get his first Romantic Instant Date with a stranger. This happened on the second training session as will be revealed in the video. He is originally from Arizona and flew in to New York to get coaching and hired me for the whole weekend which was Fri, Sat, and Sunday. He met 3 of my girls and questioned them about how I met them to learn from the stories.

One of them is Elaine. She is a local girl who was born and grew up in the New York atmosphere. She also has a really huge social circle. When I met her she was the typical MAYBE GIRL, which I think is VERY importnat to note that most girls who talks to you will be MAYBE GIRLS.

Meet Elaine Wayne

She is in the Fashion Industry and has an excellent eye for fashion. Listen guys, FASHION IS KEY in stranger approaching. Your first impression is all you have, so why not optimize EVERY CATEGORY?

Elaine prepares Pacino infield.

Anyways, Elaine also brings a good perspective since she is a young woman in here “PRIME”. She accompanied me infield for the weekend.

SHe also came with me to “The 2012 DATING CONFERENCE”, which was on the Saturday. She helped Pacino with his style and certain aspects of his approach before he went in field.

As a result, Pacino was able to get his first ever romantic instant date. Shout outs to Pacino.

Also, shout outs to Elaine, thanks babes 😉

Romantic Connection…

Valentines Day is a time in the year for business to make money and all men must put their women on pedestals. This supports the whole feminist movement to spoil our modern day brainwashed women. I can’t really blame them. Truth is, men do not care about Valentines day, we only do it to make our lovers happy. 

I try to find some middle ground in my relationships, however, i never liked valentines day. Valentine’s Day, like any other holiday, expects you to act different on that one time per year. WOmen expect you to act like you are some romantic sap with flowers and a fiddle while crying out your unconditional love for them while they sit down and just watch.

Anyways, enough with my ranting for now. Here is a conversation with one woman I was dating on and off. Notice how I put her in her place and then she thanks me for it.SHe realized that Valentines Day was actually driving us further apart due to its “expectations” for men to be super romantic that day. SHe is Light Blue and I am  the purple bubble.

Lost in The Valentine’s Day Syndrome….

CLICK ON PICTURE TO READ THE WHOLE THING

These guys are so true about Valentines Day

I will attempt to explain why familiarity breeds attraction and how we can utilize this knowledge to the fullest.

DEFINE:

This is a scientific concept that suggests that we are attracted to what we see around us the most. It is true that EVERYTHING we see and hear affects us either consciously or subconsciously at some level.

When we look at how our parents dressed in the past, it looks very weird and ‘not cool’ because we are not familiar with that style in our day to day modern lives.  For example, in the early nineties, people use to wear extremely baggy clothes. That time it was normal for the ‘cool’ people to dress this way. Same applies for slangs, games, way of socializing etc.

Same applies to humans of different races. This is the reason for natural prejudices between all races. Let’s take an American white girl who grew up with mostly white friends and dated mostly white men. She will be more easily attracted to what she already knows. Same, applies to other races.

Another example is how the media dictates what is “beautiful” or “handsome”.  During the renaissance period, a few centuries ago, people such as Leonardo da Vinci aided in setting the standard of beauty for that generation which were more “chubby” or “plump” women.

She is what was considered perfection

The same concept applies to modern day beauty. In the media, most of the celebrities are caucasian. Most of the models are very thin. Nothing is wrong with this, this is just the way it is. So what happens to everyone in the world? They see this in movies and music ALL the time and become FAMILIAR with a certain image/stereotype of them. Same applies with blacks in media. They show them mostly as street thugs hence a black guy just ‘looks’ more alpha than a white guy from the depiction of music and movies. I do not think there is any conspiracy behind this or anything. The fact is that the white population is far bigger than other minorities, it is only natural to have a higher percentage of white celebrities.

This concepts goes much deeper. Familiarity can also be related to other things like cars, websites, food, music etc.

HOW IS THIS RELATED TO PICK UP?

Firstly, I would like to make a further distinction to perfect this phrased ideology.

I do not think that ‘familiarity’ directly ‘breeds’ attraction.

Instead, Familiarity breeds COMFORT! And comfort allows ATTRACTION to enter. If a girl is not socially comfortable with you, she will not be receptive to your game.

Think about it. I am a black man of caribbean descent. Assuming that I grew up around black-caribbean women, it would be easier for me to feel more comfortable around a NEW black girl as opposed to if ( everything else equal ) I met a NEW white girl who I have less in common with. I will feel more comfortable with what I am familiar with. This will make the process easier for me to deal with.

Now, this is NOT ONLY racial. This is within subcultures and stereotypes.

Let’s say there is a white college jock and he approaches a white Goth girl. He would have a harder time getting her as a jock than if he was a goth kid himself ( ceteris paribus/ everything else equal.) Why? She is not familiar with hanging around and connecting with the jock type. Hense, if he was a goth white kid, her familiarity with his stereotype will help to breed FAMILIARITY which will ultimately make her feel more COMFORTABLE and OPEN to him. After this is established, it will make it much easier for him to generate ATTRACTION because she is more open to his kind/stereotype. It’s very difficult to attract a girl without comfort, especially when a woman is sober.

This is also the reason why minorities will experience difficulties trying to pick up girls outside of their race. I can lie to the world and say it does not matter what race you are… but that would be bullshit. Now, once the girl is very into the minority, then he can use that romantic connection to get her and keep her. However, interms of the “pick-up” aspect, they will have a harder time establishing BASIC SOCIAL COMFORT. Without it, there is no attraction.

This is the reason why I never really liked online game as a means to pick up hotter women of other races. I can verify that all the girls in my ‘LAY REPORTs SECTION’ would not even respond to me if I messaged them online as a stranger. They would instantly ignore me and in rare cases message me back just because they were bored. However, I would not be able to get a date from them because they would have stereotyped me and there would be NO familiarity.

Here is a GREAT post this matter that even OKCUPID spoke about interms of the response rates that different races of men were receiving. Here is a post that talks about this issue HERE.

HOW CAN WE UTILIZE THIS IN PICK-UP?

We've all been there

That’s what I like about gaming face-to-face, I can use language and conversational topics to relate to them more and make them feel COMFORTABLE with me so they can see past the stereotype they may have of me. This will allow me to create attraction and progressively escalate to the bedroom and beyond.

 My first goal, regardless of opening direct or indirect, is to establish some Basic Social Comfort with the girl to make her more familiar with me. This is easier said than done. After coaching for three years, most guys have no idea of whether they have enough comfort or not. It’s not their fault. Women will talk to you and be polite and not necessarily feel connected to you. It’s not easy to tell.

If you notice some of my ‘infield videos’. I usually have a social vibe in the beginning. Some guys who are really insecure with their manhood would say “he seems like he is being too friendly, or he is not being agressive enough, or he seems to shakey”. Here is the truth. The way I engage some of the girls outside my race are in a certain way to what they are familiar with. If I actually spoke to them like my GANGSTER cousins in Brooklyn New York. They will NOT look at me as alpha, they will simply be creeped out. THEY are NOT FAMILIAR with that kind of behavior. I know this because I used to be very agressive and loved to fight in my younger days. I used to be in the wrong company when I was in my teens and I temporarily dropped out of school due to gang wars. It was serious.  I hung out with real guys in the streets and they get women from their reputation, not because they are agressive in general.

OLD ME:

Many guys asked me “How do you do so well with other races so seamlessly?”

Simple. I spent my teens in the Caribbean. My vibe was very RAW and I had a thick Caribbean accent that sounded too rough. When I came back to America, I noticed that I just couldn’t connect with most people on a deeper level easily. Not even with African-American girls. The only girls I connected with were Caribbean. This was because that was all I was familiar with. One thing I did to help me understand different races/subcultures was to listen to their music, television shows etc. I even watched shows like Gossip Girl, 90210, etc to slowly understand the mind of the modern spoiled and overly feminized American women. This was all done as an experiment just to see if it would help. I also followed celebrity news just to learn about it. I noticed when I re-applied this in pick up, it changed the dynamics. I even changed the way I spoke to them;using a funny and quirky vibe since thats what they are more familiar with in general. It made a difference interms of getting them connected. I did other thing also.

You would probably notice that sometimes I would have this young kid vibe while engaging younger girls… I do it because that is what they are familiar with. That familiarity breeds comfort, which later breeds attraction.

Even in mini subcultures, there is a totally different set of languages used with an 18 year old  vs a 28 year old. There are new things that are cool. There are newer definitions of what  ‘cool’ is. This is where the pick up is an ART. I have successfully developed a UNIVERSAL style that helps me to lay a higher variation of girls. (Keep in mind, I do have to adjust minor things)

That’s why OLDER MEN must be in with the times of fashion, news, trends etc. The social subtleties keep evolving slowly and it’s good to keep up-to-date. I even listen to new hippie music now just to get a feel for whats out there. In short, stay relevant.

DISCLAIMER:

I am very well aware that the argument of  “why should one change himself while engaging the woman”…

ALL OF THESE POINTS ARE WHAT OCCURS MOST FREQUENTLY. We do not care about the 1% chance. That is not what efficiency is all about. 

I am coming from an extremely scientific aka trial-and-error aka statistical approach to solving and refining pick up. I am not saying that you SHOULD change yourself. I am saying this is what can be done to INCREASE your ODDS. If you want to just do what you want, fine.

Also, I am NOT saying that every man should act quirky. People will have to find their own balance. I had to use quirky due to my stereotype and original vibe that I conveyed. Some guys need to be more calm, while other guys look too playerish, while other guys… you get the point. That’s why I am a dating coach, I assist men with developing their style.

Furthermore,

The idea of CHANGING YOURSELF is rather complex. Do you act the exact same way to your mother as you would to your girlfriend? DO you act the same way to your boss as you would to your child?

NO. If you do, you probably have aspergers.

However, I do agree that you do not want to go against your core. But that’s a different topic for a different night 🙂